If you’re here reading this, I want to let you in on a little secret. Being a woman, a mom, a partner, or just a busy person often means putting yourself last. And somewhere along the way, I had this “aha” moment that changed everything about how I see self-care and my own happiness.

You see, I’m a mom of five, and carving out time for myself? It’s like planning a moon landing! Spending money on myself has always come with a side of guilt. Yet, there was one thing I’d wanted to do for so long—something for myself, to reconnect with me beyond my roles as mom, partner, and all the other hats I wear daily.

The Endless Cycle of Guilt

For the longest time, every time I thought about doing something just for me, I’d get close to booking it, then talk myself out of it. Thoughts like, “It’s not in the budget,” or “It’s not necessary,” or “Maybe next year” would creep in. I’d push it aside, back into the world of “someday” wishes.

The feeling of guilt would settle in, making me think I’d done the “right” thing by putting myself on the back burner. But deep down, a part of me felt let down—a bit disappointed that I wasn’t giving myself the space to thrive. I was waiting for the “perfect” time to celebrate who I am beyond all my responsibilities.

The Moment I Finally Said Yes to Myself

Then, one night, something clicked. I realized that waiting for a perfect time or permission was never going to happen. I had a spark of courage and just went for it—I booked the boudoir session I’d always dreamed of. Yes, I put it on a credit card, which isn’t something I do lightly, but at that moment, I knew this choice was different.

The surprise? It didn’t feel selfish. It didn’t feel irresponsible. It felt… freeing. Like I had finally given myself permission to breathe. That one experience filled me up so much that I woke up the next morning energized in a way I hadn’t felt in ages. I even felt inspired to journal—a little ritual I love but had put aside for “more important” things. That single decision changed everything.

Self-Care Isn’t Selfish—It’s Essential

I realized that taking time for myself wasn’t indulgent; it was necessary. The experience of seeing myself through a different lens, of celebrating who I am, wasn’t just empowering. It was life-giving. Self-care is about giving to ourselves so we can continue to show up fully for those we love. By nurturing ourselves, we’re better equipped to nurture others.

This experience with boudoir photography reminded me that we deserve moments that are just for us. Choosing to do something for myself didn’t just impact me; it made me a better, happier version of myself for everyone in my life. And that’s why I don’t feel guilty anymore.